To all the lost dreams…

It breaks my heart

Some old songs from my HS band, Mission Improbable.
I pulled out my mom’s old guitar tonight and a huge stack of songs, poems, and random writings.  When I was a kid I had four main things I wanted to be, 1 a writer, 2 a veterinarian, 3 a kick ass musician, and 4 a filmmaker.  Currently working on writer, realized didn’t want to be a vet pretty quick because I have trouble with blood (but hey I groom dogs that’s close right?), and well musician I lost that battle in college when I put my focus on being a filmmaker.

What did you want to be when you were a kid?

A rock star, firefighter, teacher, writer, lion tamer, actor, chef!?

When did you first think, ‘maybe this isn’t attainable’ or ‘maybe this isn’t realistic’?  They’re thoughts we’ve all had and should never listen to!

It’s been 10 years since I graduated high school and it breaks my heart seeing the lost dreams of me and my peers.  This past year I pushed to publish my first book because, you guessed it, being a published writer has been a life long goal of mine.  I love my book, The Half Life.  It’s the first in a 7 book series that has been in my head for 10 years. TEN YEARS I have been thinking and dreaming about this book, the characters, the lives they live (live in my head, yea, I know, I’m a little nuts with people living in my head).  But last year I said enough is enough and got these people 1/7th out of my head and onto paper.  This November book 2 will be released, Army of the Almost Dead.

Why?  Because I’m tired of thinking about living my life and started living it the way I want to.  My full time job might pay the bills, but it doesn’t fulfill my heart.  Even though it means lots of sleepless nights and losing time with my loved ones.  Maybe its selfish, but there’s nothing more important than living the dreams you dream about everyday.

You know what’s better than dreaming them?  Living them!

I’m writing this for anyone who has ever had a dream that they looked down and kicked their foot around in the dirt, shrugging, and said ‘I dunno what happened… I just stoped’. I stopped playing guitar or I stopped making movies on my video camera because I thought, jeez, I’ll never live up to the greats.  Or I’ll never be good enough.  Let me tell you something, you are more than good enough and you don’t have to live up to one of the greats.  You only have to live up to you.

You can’t give up and start thinking.  Thinking is poison to dreams.  You can only do a dream.  One step at a time, one day at a time, with the bigger picture in the forefront of your mind every day.

Don’t say I can’t, because I can’t just means I never tried.  And if you have tried and you failed, you have to try again.  There’s nothing worse than letting yourself believe that you weren’t or aren’t good enough.  Don’t shrink your dreams, expand your ability.

Work harder, work smarter, and above all else always do what you love even if you have to do it broke or on no sleep because we only get one chance at this life.  I mean unless we are reincarnated then you get more chances, but more chances at a different life.  So focus on this one for now 😂

Don’t lose your dreams.

Write them down.  Here are my goals for the next 4 years!

5 books, among many other personal and professional goals.  Love your life by living your life ❤️

Dreams are what holds this world together.


This is dedicated to my amazing musician friend.  You talents and beautiful outlook on life are so precious.  Don’t give up on who you are.


Published by Ellie

By day I'm a dog groomer, by night writer, business owner, human mom and dog mom. Jasper the Picard, Gideon the Frenchie, and Daryl the scruffy mutt, Norman the Picard, & Vinny the Biewer. "Be kind for everyone you meet..."

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